Decreased sexual desire: clear steps to understand and improve low libido

Not feeling interested in sex can be frustrating and confusing. Low sexual desire is common and usually has a mix of causes — physical, mental, and medication-related. The good news: most causes are treatable if you know where to start. This page gives simple, practical steps you can try right now and when to see a clinician.

What commonly causes decreased sexual desire?

Medications: Many drugs can blunt libido. Antidepressants (especially SSRIs), some blood pressure meds, certain antipsychotics, and hormonal agents may lower desire. If you take drugs like Aldactone (spironolactone), Depakote (valproate), or long-term opioids, mention them to your doctor — they can sometimes affect sex drive.

Hormones and health conditions: Low testosterone in men, thyroid problems, diabetes, and chronic illnesses can reduce desire. For women, low estrogen, menopause changes, or post-partum hormonal shifts matter too.

Mental health and stress: Depression, anxiety, past trauma, and daily stress are major libido killers. Poor sleep and burnout also drain interest.

Relationship and lifestyle factors: Unresolved conflict, poor communication, heavy drinking, smoking, and lack of exercise all reduce sexual desire over time.

Practical steps you can take today

1) Check your meds — don’t stop them alone. Make a list of all prescriptions and ask your prescriber whether any could cause low libido. Often switching drugs or adding an alternative (bupropion is sometimes used when SSRIs reduce libido) helps, but changes should be managed by a clinician.

2) Get basic tests. Ask for blood tests for testosterone (men), thyroid function, and a general metabolic panel. These can spot common, treatable causes.

3) Improve sleep and cut back on booze. Aim for 7 hours a night and limit alcohol and recreational drugs — both blunt sex drive.

4) Move more. Regular exercise raises mood and hormones. Even 30 minutes of brisk walking most days helps.

5) Talk about it. Open, calm conversations with your partner reduce pressure and make intimacy feel safer. If talking feels hard, a trained sex therapist or couples counselor can guide you.

6) Treat mood problems. If depression or anxiety is present, treating it often restores libido. Combining therapy with medication adjustments is a common path.

7) Consider targeted treatments. For specific issues (like erectile problems or low testosterone), your clinician may recommend medications, topical treatments, or hormone therapy. Drugs for performance (PDE5 inhibitors) don’t fix desire, but can help confidence while you address the root cause.

If your loss of desire is sudden, severe, or paired with other worrying symptoms, contact a healthcare professional. Don’t blame yourself — decreased sexual desire is a medical and relational issue, not a moral failing. Small, practical changes and the right medical checks often make a big difference.